Tuesday, July 30, 2013

The longest break up in the history of ever... Bachelorette 7/29/13

Hey friends! Hope you have been well while winding this semi-unfortunate season of The Bachelorette to an end.

Did you watch The Men Tell All special? So did we. I actually was going to blog about it, but every time I sat down to write it up, I felt like I was rehashing all the same old things we have all already talked about. Because that's what the men in this season are all about: talking everything to death.

But, now we are down to the final three men in Antigua and there is apparently drama ahead, as the previews showed plenty of tears to go around.

Desiree recapped her relationships with each of the three men, and based on what she had to say, I think we all know Drew and Chris do not stand even a remote chance. Desiree has made it clear that she in fact loves Brooks, and has said that her relationship with Brooks is on another level than the others. Des, why are we even still here? Couldn't you have made a deal with ABC where we watched you and Brooks get to know each other for a few weeks, rather than dragging all these other guys, and their families, through the all this unnecessary drama?

Desiree's first date was with Drew. He's sweet, he's easy on the eyes, he uses a lot of hair product, he may be gay, but I go into watching this date thinking two things:

1. Poor Drew. Desiree is going to send you home.
2. When is all the crying going to start?

But, regardless of my thoughts, Drew and Desiree spent the day driving and going to an Antiguan market village. It was exactly the kind of date you would want to have if you were in fact in love with the person you were with, which Desiree is apparently not. Their dinner on the beach was washed out by rain, so our Dynamic Duo entered the fantasy suite early, where they apparently were not allowed to eat their dinner? Just because it is raining, ABC, doesn't mean they don't want to eat. The pair had a talk about open communication and assertiveness, and then Drew booted the cameras right out of the suite so he and Desiree could do whatever it is that they were going to do in there.

We next found ourselves in Boise, Idaho where our friend Brooks needed to go to see his mom and sister before being going to Antigua. Brooks sat down with two of the ladies in his life to discuss his feelings, where he is at emotionally with his relationship with Desiree, and whether or not he was truly in love with her.

Right off the bat, Brooks says he's uncomfortable with the idea of proposing to Desiree and that he shies away from answering the question of whether or not he loves her. Well, Brooks, if you already know these two things, why are we even still here? Brooks of course says there are a lot of things he does love about Desiree, but he's just not far enough down the relationship road and isn't ready for all this. His sister told him he should really know by now, and that if he wasn't where he needed to be yet, then he wasn't in love. Because it is so unrealistic that a guy would need more than 9 weeks before being ready to propose to a girl? We have clearly somehow gotten our priorities skewed here in Bachelor(ette) nation, and Brooks's sister has fallen right down the rabbit hole.

Next up, Desiree's date with Chris. The two took a helicopter ride to a deserted beach where they set up a delightful picnic. Again, we have an example of a romantic date with a sweet guy, who we already know Desiree is not in love with. What I want to know is, Desiree, why are you doing all of this?

Let's just say you choose Brooks and the two of you are happy as clams. Now, the two of you are home together, watching the season on TV, and Brooks is saying "Wait- if you knew you were in love with me, why were you and Chris rolling around in the surf together?" Think it through, Desiree, think it through.

Back to the date, Chris and Desiree went to their romantic dinner, where I was completely distracted by the screeching noises coming from the jungle behind them. (Did anyone else hear them? Seriously, they were almost the only thing I could focus on.) Desiree, who is, again, in love with a different guy, asks Chris about the future. They discussed the job he has in Seattle and the prospects of her moving there to be with him, which are apparently good. Even though she doesn't love him? (In case you hadn't picked up on it, Desiree is driving me nuts in this episode. I am clearly ready for our new season to start in January.)

Desiree offered Chris the fantasy suite card, which he naturally accepted, and then read her some poetry. Of course.

Now that we have seen dates for both Chris and Drew, it is as if the two of them are completely interchangeable for Desiree. She says all the same things about both of them, and there seems to be very little variation.

We were now treated to another one of Desiree's little love fests for Brooks. Which was particularly poignant considering we already know Brooks is having serious doubts.

Brooks was in fact having so many doubts that he needed to schedule a sit down with everyone's favorite therapist, Chris Harrison.

Brooks tried, very unsuccessfully, to explain to Chris (and all of us) how he was feeling about Desiree. Basically, what it boils down to is this: Brooks is not in love with Desiree. He has strong feelings for her, which in any normal relationship after the 9 week mark would likely be enough, but not strong enough to call her the love of his life. So, we are where we are. Had Brooks and Desiree met on the streets, would those two crazy kids have been able to work it out? We may never know. But what we do know is that Brooks probably needs a little more time before proposing to a girl and he unfortunately is not going to get it.

Meanwhile, Desiree has been preparing herself for a romantic, stress free day with Brooks and she is thrilled when she sees him approaching her. Until she realizes somethings wrong. And the poor girl, I honestly think she didn't realize it was about her until they had crossed the beach, walked down a dock, and found a bench.

We then began the longest break-up in the history of ever. Desiree was (finally) honest with someone and told Brooks that she was in love with him, not with the other guys. To which he responded, "Why didn't you tell me?" Maybe Brooks was just guarding and protecting his heart (thanks Kasey!) because he didn't want to fall in love with someone who might not choose him? Maybe if he had known, he could have let himself fall in love? Again, things we won't know because of the magic of TV dating.

Brooks and Desiree broke up for almost 30 minutes. There was a lot of crying, a lot of sighing, a lot of apologies... it was really not a pretty scene.

Why now, Brooks? Because I didn't know before, Desiree.

There are so many things I love about you, Desiree. That isn't making it any easier, Brooks. 

I was conflicted because I wanted to be spending all my time with you, Brooks. I wish you had told me that sooner, Desiree.

I lose our connection when we are apart, Desiree. Go to hell, Brooks. (Ok, she didn't say that. But she should have.)


Meanwhile, Brooks' hair took this opportunity to star in its own show entitled "Watch Me Dance" in which Brooks' hair was OUT OF CONTROL. Dude, if you are going to choose to have hair that long, know your boundaries with running your hands through it.

After they FINALLY separated, Desiree went back to the water to cry by herself, and Brooks, also cried alone in the woods. But why the sobs, Brooks? Because you don't want to leave Desiree?

I think Brooks was unprepared for what happened in his break up with Des. I don't think he expected to find out that Desiree was so desperately in love with him.

But what will happen next Bachelorette fans?? Will this sudden turn of break up events be enough to make Brooks realize he is in love with Desiree, and he was just afraid? Or will he head back to Utah and settle down there?

And what will happen to Chris and Drew?

I suppose we will all have to tune in next week to find out.

1 comment:

  1. The longest break up ever. I am pretty sure they are STILL breaking up right now. I cannot imagine how they come back from this one. This season is just the WORST.-Ashley

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